Vampiress Cosplay: "Batgirl"

Batgirl is the alter-ego of Barbara Gordon. Barbara is the daughter of police commissioner James Gordon in DC's Batman franchise who eventually becomes a sidekick of the caped crusader.  As superhero comics usually do different versions of the same character exist across multiple universes.  In a few of those universes Barbara either is a vampire (DC Bombshells), becomes one (Earth 43 version) or appears as one in a hallucination by an obsessed vampire hunter (Prime Earth).  No live action version of Batgirl has existed since Alicia Silverstone played the character in 1997's box office bomb "Batman and Robin" but a Batgirl film is currently in development for sometime in the early 2020's.

(Sidenote: This character is different from "Batwoman" whose comic book version also becomes a vampire)

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Vampiress Review: "Suck"

The Gist: A struggling band makes it big when the world falls for their female bass player after she's turned into a vampire but her vampirism leads to a ton of other problems.

Female Vampire Factor: Our main vampiress in his film is Jennifer (Jessica Pare).

She was very attractive before but once she becomes a vampire the band revolves around her.  The biggest problem being that she doesn't actually have control over her vampirism so if left alone will feed on whomever is present other than her own band mates.  She eventually convinces the bands roadie Hugo to serve as pretty much her familiar cleaning up the bodies of those she feeds on.

Final Opinion:  This is a horror comedy musical that I very much enjoyed.  There is actually technically one more female vampire in the film as the vampire hunter of the film "Eddie Van Helsing" (Malcolm McDowell) had a girlfriend who was also a singer and it's revealed that she too is a vampire but no fangs and she's turned back human shortly afterword.  Basically this film is a tribute to rock music and most of the characters outside of the band are playing by rock and roll legends like Alice Cooper, Iggy Pop and Henry Rollins.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  No seductive biting is the only thing keeping it from a full 5 (there's literally a scene where she feeds from a straw in a guys neck like a Capri Sun so no sexy) but there is a lot of biting and fang flashing.

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Vampiress Review: "Fanged Up"

The Gist: After a run in at the bar he worked at a womanizer is given an overly harsh punishment and sent to a prison where inmates have been disappearing and he must escape to stay alive.

Female Vampire Factor: This is one of those, "There's one super hot female in the film that the main vampire has his eye on and the film holds you in suspense on whether it happens or not even though logically they could have turned her at any point" movies.

But I'll save you some time and tell you she does not turn.  The only female vampires in the film are the lunch lady and the head guard Renfield

Thing is, when they turn it's not a very good look anyway.

Final Opinion: It's an ok horror comedy.  It plays out more like a zombie film than a vampire film.  The comedy isn't forced and stupid so the film is watchable even if it gets a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5.  The film does star WWE wrestler Stu "Wade Barrett" Sanders as a Russian prisoner and pretty much the main action guy in the film to the main protagonists comic relief.  Obviously I would have preferred if the main damsel in distress of this film Dr. Katie got turned though.

Vampiress Review: "Girls Just Wanna Have Blood"

The Gist: An unpopular girl who lives with her neglectful mother befriends a group of girls who end up being a brood of vampires that want to recruit her.

Female Vampire Factor: Your main vamps are April, Trish and Stacy.

Trish (middle) is the leader of the group with the other two being just followers.  It's never explained how exactly she became a vampire but it is explained that she wanted to become one after her parents died in a car accident destroying her belief in religion.  Their deal is to get men really drunk or high as well as horny before they can feed on them.  This is also not explained but I assume has something to do with wanting to get drunk or high by feeding, though this isn't a must as pretty much any scene in the film where they feed on females its basically just for the sake of killing and not for pleasure.  This only happens twice though.  The first time is when they attack some mean girls from Jessica's school for revenge on how they treated her and the second being when they attack her mother.

 Next we have Jessica

They convince her to turn after the above scene as they prove to be her first real friends.  

After she's turned she bites one of the johns there to visit her mother who attempts to force himself on her and the group joins in

 but after that she immediately regrets it, accuses the group of taking advantage of her while she was drunk and spends the rest of the film not wanting to be a vampire and even attempting to kill herself through exposure to the sun.  Her perverted neighbor saves her from the sun and explains to her if the head vampire is killed (Trish) everyone she turns becomes a human again.  He does this by literally showing her a porn on VHS that explains it (one of the few scenes where I kind of laughed out loud. 

Final Opinion: Also known as "Teenage Bloodsuckin Bimbo's" This film goes into the category of awesome concept but horrid execution.  There's been what feels like a million films with this same exact premise and this one probably had the most potential.  Unfortunately the writing and lack of direction gets in the way.  While I don't have an issue with the fact that it is supposed to be a goofy comedy, the extent of the absurdness of the non vampire parts and then trying to fit the vampires into that hurts the film tremendously.  Instead of showing us some type of connection between Jessica and Trish that would justify Trish wanting to turn her we get way too much of Jessica's mother whoring around and bikers and a lot of random things happening for the sake of happening. The Trish character and for that matter Destyne Marshai's acting skills were pretty much wasted in a movie that used the actual main characters as an afterthought.  I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5 only because the vampire casting is above average and when they are on screen something decent will happen but otherwise it just feels like a bad parody of a better movie.

Vampiress Cosplay: "Veronica Lodge"

Veronica Lodge is the main love interest of Archie Andrews in the Archie comics.  While the live action series has sadly not gone this route with actress Camila Mendes on Riverdale both the comic book and animated television series have gone the route at some point of the raven haired beauty eventually becoming a vampire. Here's hoping the CW gets it's act together.

Animated Veronica

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Vampiress Review: "Rachel gets Strange"

The Gist: A lonely woman left at the alter decides to sleep with a random person to get over it.  Unfortunately for her the night she decided to do it is interrupted by her ex, her male best friend with a secret crush and a brood of vampires.

Female Vampire Factor: Unfortunately it turns out the vampires in the film are just basically wannabe's or as the movie refers to them "meth head vampires".  One girl in the group does infiltrate the house with the guise of wanting to see the room Rachel was renting.

 Since they aren't actual vampires no fangs.  Outside of the above woman and one guy in all black you can't really see the rest anyway as it's dark when they arrive and the camera is moving very wildly in a very survival horror like manor.

Final Opinion: This film is mostly a really annoying bad romantic comedy that then converts to a pretty good survival horror for the last 20 minutes.  The premise is simply a relatively attractive girl lived as a recluse in her parents vacation home in the desert sulking after being left at the alter.  Her best friend and parents try to convince her that she needs to basically just have sex just to get herself out of the rut. She ends up attempting to lour a really douchey doctor who works at the same hospital as her ex and father over under the guise of wanting to show him the room she has for rent.  This goes south when he arrives super late resulting in a pizza delivery guy almost getting the nod and then her best friend showing up to show his disapprove while admitting his feelings for her and her ex wanting her back.   

In other words the vampires are almost the hero's of the film since they put an end to what was otherwise the worst kind of lifetime film.  Anyway it gets a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out 5 for the bate and switch.

Vampiress XXX Review: "Creeping in her Crypt"

The Gist: A vampire slayer goes to a haunted mansion with the intention of destroying a bloodthirsty vampire but she has other intentions for him.

Female Vampire Factor:  The vampire in this film is played by Kendra Spade.

Final Opinion: I'll give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 3 out of 5.  Basically this is a parody of cheesy late night horror so it goes into the category of comedic porn.  The cheesiness is followed by straight forward sex (no fangs in during the sex) followed by more cheesiness afterward.  Definitely not as enjoyable as many of Brazzers other horror based films.

Vampiress Review: "Megan Thee Stallion P.I. in Hottieween"

The Gist:  After being bitten by a vampire a private investigator becomes a vigilante clearing the streets of blood sucking men targeting women.

Female Vampire Factor: As the title states the web series stars rapper Megan Thee Stallion.

The actual bite and fang out scene happens in episode 2 where she meets up with a guy she thought was a witness to the murders going on around town who ends up being the vampire doing the killing.  She is woken up two days later by her friend who for whatever reason gives her garlic for breakfast along with the much more normal opening up the curtains.  This results in Megan running into her bathroom in pain where she notices she has fangs just prior to her reflection disappearing.

Final Opinion: I'm going to give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 4 out of 5.  It's three very short episodes that are straight to the point.  Episode 2 is where it's at as far as fangs go as episode 1 is just the setup and episode 3 is where she catches up to the vampire that turned her and kills him to go back to normal followed by a music video/blooper real.  Only thing keeping it from a five is that she never really struggles with the blood lust and all her bite scenes in episode 2 where she's attacking the male vampires are either off camera or not very good aesthetically (no fang out). Give me at least one real scene of her struggling to hold back (better than just talking about it which she does) and this had potential to be really good.

Vampiress Review: The Invasion of the Vampires

The Gist:  A vampire count is leading men to their deaths by enticing them with his hypnotized daughter and it is up to an outsider doctor to figure out what's going on and stopping it.

Female Vampire Factor: Only one in the film is the countess.  She's dead most of the film but the way the lore in this film works when the count is killed everyone he has bitten comes back as a vampire so once he's staked in his (very cheesy) bat form.

The vampires he's turned rise from their coffins including the countess.

Final Opinion: So this is the second film in the Count Frankenhousen series from Mexico with the first being 1962's "The Bloody Vampire". Both films center around the vampire count and his loyal human servant Brunhilde using the local village as his own personal blood bank.  Brunhilde wants to be a vampire so her loyalty comes from the promise that the count will turn her one day.

I give the film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 2 out of 5.  Pretty much one female vampire scene out of two films (the first film has mostly women being bitten but no turning).  I'd recommend Italy's Cave of the Living Dead from 1964 which pretty much tells the same story as this but with more female vampirism (which isn't saying a lot honestly).