Female vampires once ruled the world. Now they are overlooked for glittering guys with big hair. It's time to point out why the female of the species should be the center of attention.
Soulidium out of Tampa, Florida if you can't tell is a hard rock/metal band. Sadly watching as many low budget vampire movies as I have I am almost oblivious to this style of music though this one is pretty catchy. None the less this isn't a music review blog so lets skip to the important part.
This is a very well put together music video definitely worth watching. The story (yes it has a story) is that the members of the band are vampires. The Bands frontman Micheal McKnight grabs an attractive young girl in an ally and bites her turning her into a vampire (above). This leads to the girl going on an extended night of attacking various other people including another attractive girl who she also turns into a vampire (below).
So basically outside of the first 30 seconds of the video the entire thing is attractive women fanging out and biting people. In other words exactly how I wish every vampire film ever made would be.
Dark Shadows is a franchise that started out as a daytime soap opera on the ABC network in 1966. The original run of the show lasted over a thousand episodes (as it aired daily) and finally ended five years later in 1971. The show also spawned 3 movies, House of Dark Shadows (1970), Night of Dark Shadows (1971) and Dark Shadows (2012) as well as TWO revivals (one that aired on the NBC Network in 1991 and one that was made but never aired for the WB Network in 2004.
The cast of the un-aired 2004 Dark Shadows revival Ivana Milicevic (Angelique), Alec Newman (Barnabas) and Marley Shelton (Victoria)
While the original series started out in 1966 vampires didn't come into play until 1967 when the character Barnabas Collins was introduced. It would go into other supernatural entities during it's 5 year run but it was the vampire storyline which carried the series (much like ABC's other supernatural daytime soap Port Charles) and this would even effect the original films as the vampire related "House" was much more successful than the ghost centered "Night" film.
Vampires of Dark Shadows (original run 1966 to 1971)
Marcia Wallace (Megan Todd)
Megan Todd was a vampire in episodes 963 thru 971
Danna Wandrey (Roxanne Drew)
Roxanna was a vampire in episodes 1081 thru 1177
Those are the only main character vampires exclusive to the original series (there were some random nameless female vampire thrown in here and there). The rest as you will see are used in different forms throughout the Dark Shadows universe. One character who always appears in most incarnations of the franchise is the character Josette. Josette is the original love interest of Barnabas Collins. As the story goes the witch Angelique was jealous of their love which resulted in her cursing Barnabas with being a vampire for all eternity forcing him to live without Josette who kills herself via jumping off a cliff.
In the original series evil witch Angelique shows Josette a vision of what she would be like as a vampire in episode 425
Katherine Leigh Scott as Josette in the original series
In the 1991 revival timeline the story of Barnabases turning is changed to where Angelique creates a vampire version of Josette who ends up biting and turning Barnabas as seen in episode 9.
Joanna Going as Josette in the 1991 revival
This means had the show lasted longer than 13 episodes their would have possibly been a vampire Josette siting but going by logic the Alena/Katherine story on Vampire Diaries is probably the direction it would have went (innocent new love vs evil lookalike bitch that turned you) since that show seems to borrow from this series quite a bit.
Now as was popular with the whole "vampire is a guy with a tortured past longing for a lost love" storyline there is always an exact reincarnation of that lost love that appears in the future. In the Dark Shadows universe Josettes doppelgangers name is Victoria Winters.
How Victoria ends up in Collinwood changes from series to series but the one thing that is always the same is that she looks exactly like Josette and Barnabas is obsessed with her because of it. She has vampire moments in two versions of the newer Dark Shadows story...
Bella Heathcote (2012)
(!!SPOILER!!)In the 2012 feature length comedy Barnabas saves Victoria who attempts suicide the same way Josette did by turning her as she fell off the cliff.
But this is where everything gets weird as from story to story situations stay the same but who lives them changes from genre to genre. For example in the 1991 series we get a fantastic moment as episode three started out with a great vampire dream sequence in which Daniel Collins (Joseph Gordon Levitt) dreamed that all the Collinwood women (including Josette and Carolyn) were vampires.
The thing about the 1991 series is that it takes many elements from the original show and the movies and tries to recreate them exactly but still change them (if that makes sense). For example we have this scene that is stripped directly from the "House of Dark Shadows" film but in House of Dark Shadows (top) it was Carolyn Stoddard (Nancy Barrett) who turns and in the revival (bottom) it was Daphne Collins (Rebecca Staab)...
This is what I mean by exact reproduction but different. The stories are exactly the same just with different characters doing it. Nothing of interest happens to either character really in the 2012 film. Actually I take that back, Daphne isn't mentioned at all in the film but Caralyn (Chloe Moretz) does become a werewolf.
Another character that gets the creative license treatment in the 2012 film is that of Dr. Julia Hoffman played by English actress Helena Bonham Carter. In the original stories Dr. Hoffman becomes a major ally to Barnabus and helps him throughout his undead life. This changes in the updated film where Dr. Hoffman promises to go that route but eventually Barnabas finds out she's instead been using his blood to try to make herself immortal which he permanently puts a stop too. This is the only version of Dr. Hoffman who becomes a vampire in the Dark Shadows universe.
Now that we got those out of the way we get to one of my favorite villains ever and thats Angelique Bouchard Collins. Maybe it's just me but there is just something about the sexy supernatural psycho stalker angle I can't get enough of. Long before True BloodsViolet and Lorena or Vampire DiariesKatherine and Tesa; Angelique was obsessing over Barnabas Collins and planning on destroying anyone who gets in her way of getting him including Barnabas himself.
In most cases Angelique meets her mortal demise around the same time Josette does leaving Barnabas completely alone with the exception of her ghost until she eventually is reincarnated in modern times. In the original series she gets resurrected as a vampire by Nicolas Blair and that's when that series got fun as Lara Parkers portrayal of Angelique fanged out quite a bit.
Sadley due to the horrible shelf life of the franchises revival we never get to see what Lysette Anthony could have done with a vampire Angelique character (though if you want to see her with fangs she plays a vampire inDracula Dead and Loving it and on an episode of the syndicated seriesNight Man).
Lysette Anthony as Angelique (1991)
Fact is I could probably end this Dark Shadows blog with Parker but that's not going to happen. Even though she doesnt' get turned in the end the fact is Eva Green plays Angelique as a full blown sex pot in the 2012 movie and that is worth mentioning.
Yeah, she'd be a vampire if there were a sequel but that's probably not happening considering she was the only thing worth watching in that film but I can only imagine how great sexpot vampire Angelique would have been. Since it's not going to happen we can just end this by staring at what we did have.
The Gist: A high school teen throws a Halloween party at a creepy house which is crashed by an ancient relative of hers reincarnated as a vampire.
Clarification: This was a made for TV Halloween special from 1985 which aired on the ABC network. Since it aired on a Friday night it was not a very serious horror and was very light and campy (Friday nights being ABC's most successful night for comedies for decades).
The film basically follows a pretty cut and dry premise. A bunch of trouble making "kids" (I use quotes because I'm pretty sure everyone in this film is well over 20 playing teenagers. In fact they don't look like teenagers at all and most of the main actors were over 30 including Reading Rainbows Lavare Burton.) steal some stuff from a museum, mess around in a graveyard accidentally raising the dead (without them knowing) and then throw a party.
The now undead great times a few grandmother of the girl throwing the party shows up and turns her great times a few granddaughter into a vampire then teaches her to turn other people who then repeat this process till everyone at the party is a vampire. After that it's up to the one party straggler and his new girlfriend to break the curse and save the town. Selling Point: Great Soundtrack (I to this day think of this film the second I hear "How Soon is Now" by the Smiths) also a ton of female neck biting.
Female Vampire Factor: Well that's eventually every female in the film with the exception of one girl who's identity is a bit of a major swerve so I won't ruin it. Your main ones are the resurrected ancestor of the character Melissa, A witch named Lucinda played by Jonelle Allen.
Of course with the above scene you see Melissa (Sherri Belafonti-Harpor) get turned.
Throughout the film you get some song and dance scenes and there is even a cameo by the legendary Wolfman Jack. As cheesy as this sounds it is an above average vampire film and I give it a Vampire Beauty Rating of 5 out of 5. These two aren't the only female vamps that get major screen time they're just the most important to the overall story and it's the female vamps that are turning everyone so you'll get more than your money's worth of females with fangs with this film.
The Gist: A town plagued by disease is visited by a circus which happens to be run by vampires.
Clarification: A hammer horror film so it obviously takes place in the 19th century somewhere in Austria. Anyway a town as always in these films was being plagued by vampires, the townspeople find out and they kill him but not before he puts a curse on the town. A few years later many of the towns people are dying and the town is cut off from the rest of the world do to the plague but somehow a traveling circus comes in to entertain the towns folk. Once this happens people start to die and children go missing (the vampires in these films had a thing for attacking kids).
As per usual the towns people eventually figure it out and the vampires die in a firey mess (there are quite a few plot twists in the film but I won't spoil them all).
Selling Point/Female Vampire Factor: You get one real female vamp in the film (at least that fangs out anyway). As part of the circus there is a pair of acrobat twins vampires. The female twin Helga is played by Lalla Ward
The one above scene when the twins attack two of the village children is the only time she fangs out and it is very brief. That makes this one of the most guy heavy Hammer vampire films out there (Second to Dracula A.D. 1972 which had no female vampires and tied with Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter which also had one brief one). I give this film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5.
The Gist: A realtors life is in danger when a vampire becomes obsessed with his wife.
Clarification: So it's the same general Dracula story but told in modern day Los Angeles thus adding the thing most people were complaining about regarding the original Bram Stoker novel and that was hispanic gang members (ok not really). Basically Vladimir Sarkany (aka Dracula) wants a building really bad. He kills the first realtor for not being able to get the deal done (but the chick doesn't even know that you can use a key to open a car door instead of just the fob so she probably deserved it) and so the job goes to Jonathon Harker.
Harker is married to a british hotty named Lina who wants a family but for some reason he clams up when she reiterates this point to him after he tells her they might be coming into some big money. His main excuse was that he doesn't think he could be a good husband (kinda of late for that since they're already married) or father. Is this important to the plot?....not really but the movie wants you to know this anyway.
Sad thing is he is 100% right about this fact. When he brings the papers to Dracula's house for him to sign he notices a painting on the wall that looks exactly like his wife (it really doesn't but we'll just go with the movie and pretend it does). Instead of getting freaked out about a strange guy having a painting of his wife on his wall he gets excited and starts showing Drac cell phone pics of his lady love basically just to show the stalker "here's where you can find her" and even goes on to say he should meet her. Even after a guy sneaks into Harkers car and explains how Sarkany killed his wife Harker brushes it off and still brings Lina to meet him and apparently forgets about the crazy guys "he's a vampire and bit my wife" story even after they wake up and Lina has bite marks all over her and is really sick.
Selling Point/Female Vampire Factor: So this is basically one of those does she or doesn't she turn films so consider this a SPOILER (well because it is).
The object of Dracula's desire in this film is Lina Harker played by the lovely Victoria Summer
Now after her bite she falls ill and we go into watch mode with her as she develops sensitivity to sunlight and just becomes an all around introvert. It all seems normal until Jonathan catches her eating the family dog.
Harker being the complete moron he is after this point isn't convinced anything is majorly wrong and asks Lina's doctor whether her virus has dog eating as a side effect (remember, he's already been warned about vampires so there's really no excuse at this point). Eventually he starts to put two and two together with help and contacts Van Helsing (who he's referred to by the guy in his car from earlier) but by that point Sarkany already has Lina and the two go to save her.
Long story short, Drac kills Van Helsing and Lina and Jonathon kill Drac leaving a feeling of total disappointment until the films closing scene.
Lina has now taken over Sarkany's life and even lives in his old house. I give this film a Vampire Beauty Rating of 1 out of 5. Very good attempt at a modern Dracula film (and above average by straight to DVD standards) but the Standard barer in this genre is still Wes Cravens Dracula 2000.
